It’s my sister’s highschool graduation today and my granny went here to visit. So I was having a conversation with my family when suddenly my father interrupted. He yelled that he saw photos of me wearing make-up during my OJT in Traders Hotel Manila..which is by far wrong. I never applied eyeliner. I might have applied some concealer and powder to cover my blemishes but that just it. I would never stuff my face with too much colors. He is just so stereotype.

For some of you who doesn’t know the meaning of stereotypes, it is a term used to define all people of a certain belief into a mostly negative category that may only reflect a selected few of the racial demographics. All people of all nationalities have been victims of being stereotyped, even those whom have made most of the stereotypes of other people. — Thanks Urban Dictionary.

I don’t get it. Why do some people have to diss people who wear make-up? Especially guys. If putting make-up makes you look better and makes you feel good about how you look, then why not? Some people don’t really understand that because judgment always comes first. Well, I don’t care. I’ll put powder whenever I want to. I will never live to please anybody even my father who’s getting on my nerves lately. It’s 2012 already! We’re no longer in the 80’s when people used to call guys who wear make-up gay. 

I won’t care anymore whatever he says. He only cares about himself and his poorly defined thoughts. He always thinks he’s right and he knows every fucking thing. I’m not disrespecting him or whatever. I just couldn’t stand him anymore. He was not around all these years so why would I care about what he’ll say or do? God, this post is turning very emotional. I should stop.

Okay, moving on.. I’ve been thinking lately where to apply for work. Since I am graduating college on the 18th of April, I should go get a job. 

That’s all for now. 🙂


Be careful what you wish for.

I woke up at exactly 8 a.m. today. As I got off my bed, I felt a different feeling. I felt very energized, happy, and well. Finally, my fever’s gone. I’ve been waiting for this to happen………..

As the title itself says, we all should be really careful with the things that we wish for. I remember the last time I talked to a very close friend, I told him that I miss the feeling of being sick, the loss of appetite, and the feeling of wanting to die. I really missed it. And after a few days of having said that, I discovered that I am developing tonsilitis and hours later, I have a fever already. I kind of liked it at first because my dad was bugging me to go with them to the Park and I didn’t want to. When he went to my room and told me to get ready, I proudly said “I’m sick”. I was left alone in the house. Hurray! It was what I wanted for that day. The night came and I felt a lot horrible. I couldn’t breathe easily, I found it hard to stand up and do things I normally do. I wished my fever gone. But it just kept on getting worse. The pain in my throat was just excruciating. That night, Paracetamol became my best friend.

Yes, I have fever but it didn’t keep me from turning my laptop on and surf the internet. I was browsing Youtube when I recalled a line in a Pussycat Dolls song, “be careful what you wish for cause you just might get it, you just might get it”. & it struck a blow in my mind. Wishes do come true, sometimes. All the things we have right now; education, gadgets, etc: they all started from a wishful thinking. 

………So today, I’m super fine already. I ate 3 cups of rice and fish and even played with my brothers. But nothing’s changed with my daily routine. Wake up. Shower. Eat. Internet. Sick or not sick, no one can keep me from doing these things because these are what complete my day. These are what make me happy. I’m not the sporty type of guy so you’ll never see me sweaty doing a very tiring sport. I love reading books. I’d rather stay inside my room all day than go out under the hot sun and get sweaty. Ew.




Was there ever a time when you just didn’t want to care? Maybe just do whatever you wanted to and not have to think about what might happen. How you would look, feel, the consequences. You wouldn’t care about what other people would think, how they would feel.

No time for those care bears. Don’t care. Don’t wanna care. Never cared.

What if we just went out in the world and did as we pleased? Said what was at the top of our heads? Would we be living in chaos? Or would we be strong enough to hear the truth? Live the truth?

Lies. Lies. Lies. That is the world we live in. The world yesterday, today, and tomorrow. What would I do without those bittersweet lies? What would you do?

An image. We are images. Are you who you really want to be? Or are you just doing as someone else pleases? Being the person they never were. Stand up. Be who you want to be. Do what you want to do. Be happy. Eat a burger. Be mean. Be nice. Run around the mall like a complete fool. Be someone. But that someone must be you.

Sometimes you just want to break free. But sometimes you can’t. You have responsibilities. I have responsibilities. Rules are there for a rea

Stop and smell the roses.

Get dirty. Get fucking filthy. Get poor. Get off your ass.

Get desperate. Get dangerous. Get vilified. Get vile.

Get romantic. Get fucked. Get moving. Get productive.

Get pro-active. Get started. Get your own life.

Get doing something. Anything.

Because before you know it you’re 40 with kids, a mortgage, and responsibilities that cause your fun to come second.

So before cancer, before children, before 50 hour work weeks, before back and knee problems, before school loans,

before you lose your sense of humor…


Fight and fuck and run and smile. Smile because the older you get, the less you will.

So yes, “quit being such a goddamn pussy,”

because bitching and whining and worrying never made anything better.


Some things.

I’m listening to Alanis Morissette right now. Her music just lifts up my spirit. When I’m down, she brings me up. Its just the beautiful misery that does it.

I had a dream last night. I was at Rustans and I was out shopping. I could get anything I want. Money wasn’t an issue. But I didn’t know what to get. I wanted perfume, bags, shoes, jackets. Anything I could possibly get my hands on. At the end, I went home with nothing. I didn’t know what to get so I decided not to get anything at all. Then I woke up. I thought It was already 12pm. But to my surprise it was only 10.


Friend. Thats a deep word. People don’t take the time to understand it. In some way its kind of like love. For example people say ‘I love you’ to the next person they like without knowing them entirely, or even sure if they love them. With friendship, its calling someone you just met a friend. But thats not it. For me a friend is someone who will be there for you through thick and thin; who will tell you the truth no matter what; and some one who you trust with all your heart. Its kind of hard to find true friends now-a-days. I’m glad I’ve found friends of my own. :] Those are my high school friends of course. And very few people from College. Thank you guys.You complete me.

Everything has its first.

Hello. I’m Dean Russell and I’m back to blogging.

“To blog or not to blog?” That is one question that I’ve been asking myself these past few days. I stopped blogging 3 long years ago and it’s kind of hard for me to go back. I’ve been busy with school, that’s a given. But the main reason why I was having second thoughts was because I know my old blogger friends won’t be here anymore. And I doubt they even remember me. That reason was seconded by the scary feeling that no one will go and read my posts.

But Hurray! I’m here now, writing my very first post for WordPress. Back in High- School, I used Blogger and Xanga but for now, I chose the blog site which is simple and easy to use.

I remember High-School when everything I post in my blog was all about Celebrities, Crushes, Love, and all the issues troubling the dork-boy that I used to be. I loved HTML so I made a layout site for Xanga which I’m not sure if it still works. Thinking back, I realize how much I have grown physically and emotionally. Indeed, I’ve been a victim of change—-which helped me a lot.

I guess that’s all for now. 🙂